Monday, April 5, 2010

photogenerational. last summer.

We are all in a class and yeah. Teacher asked me if I knew the definition of linger. I do not know the proper definition, but I know the meaning way more, all too well.
"When will you realize? That it doesn't pay to be smarter than teacher, smarter than most kids, so shut your mouth, start kickin' the football..."
I hate to be cold and I love to be hot. I love to be smoldering, sweaty, sunny, thirsty,scorching, relentless, blazing, burningHOT!
these are my photographs from last summer

oh gary...
I miss him so much!

this is the night he said he peaked.
(peaking is when you are at your best and most popular in your life)

and rico....

always in hysterics about who knows what, always extremely tired.

Gary and Rico were my summer buddies. I loved hanging out with them because I was able to sincerely smile and laugh with them. I thought of them in my head as Mario and Luigi.
Oh last summer...

I was so very lonely and despairical 90% of the time when I wasn't with my cartoon like friends...or Oliver.

I went crazy 100 times.
I would go up to my dad's and read books where it was completely quiet, and I really would forget that anything outside of his quiet house had ever happened to me. I would also go on solo longboard trips, and that just made me feel frightened. But I did enjoy it.
I remember I was going to skip town, but it never worked out so instead I went on a killer shopping spree and spent all the money I was supposed to spend in Memphis. Nobody cared when I told them this, or believed that I really was going to go to Memphis.
(this is seriously me like in my car ready to go)

oh how delicate were my dreams

I resorted to mini fires.... which turned out to not really be a resort, because I came to absolutely love

I went on vacations

I did fun family sun stuff

Baby Finnegan was born...

I hung around strange old friends that I pretended to have fun with..
(no Lonny I really did have fun with you though)

I went to a bees game severely and literally alone
(anyone think I look like Jayde Nicole right here?)

Gary grilled for us...

I hiked ensign peak (alone again)

but then...the little fires would never last long, and burned out I was always at the end of each day, falling to sleep hollow and half.

specific relationships that caused this burn notice were cautiously repaired, like a hand sown hem going in and out of my life

when teacher asks questions now like what's the definition of linger, and what did you learn this summer? I can say...I don't know what I learned, but I don't think I would have had all the above experiences if I didn't have a friend gone missing. So I am glad for those experiences, and glad to have that friend un-hide, and now I have more friends instead of one friend, and life seems more grand
I made the most wonderful and exciting, cute friends that were GIRLS!

My friends, Sarah and Allison...who have become very meaningful to me. They are good friends and I know I'm blessed to have them.

and why now should I have harsh feelings towards lingering? I am grateful to have every experience that I do, home.

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